the things going through my head right now. Bad things, I should not listen but I want to, I want the loss of control, the near death feeling, the possibility that it could all be over. Maybe I could restart, that’s what I question, can I really begin once again? Can I really end this pain, that easily? I crave it, the craziness of these thoughts. But, no, I shouldn’t listen. Then again, since when do I do the right thing?